Safer Space
Who’s welcome here – and how we look out for each other
A safer space doesn’t mean nothing ever happens. It means you’re not alone if it does.
Who it’s for
FLINTA* – and what each letter means
Whether you belong is for you to decide. Nobody has to explain or prove themselves at the door.
F
Women
L
Lesbians
I
Inter* people
N
Non-binary people
T
Trans people
A
Agender people
*
and everyone else who isn’t a cis man
This place isn’t meant for cis men – whether they can come along to individual events is stated in the announcement.
At the door
If we ask for ID, it’s only because of age. The name and gender marker on it don’t matter.
Nobody is turned away because of how they look, their clothes, their language or passing – or because someone seems “not queer enough”. If something else happens to you at our door, that’s a mistake we want to know about: write to hallo@4pearls.de.
Together
How we treat each other
Five things we look out for – short, so they’re easy to remember.
Ask first, then touch
Whether it’s a hug, dancing or hair: don’t touch anyone without a clear yes. Flirting is part of it, pushing isn’t. A no needs no reason and still counts if there was a yes before.
Photos only with consent
Many people here aren’t out everywhere. Only photograph people who have agreed – in the background too – and ask again before you post.
Check pronouns, don’t assume
You can’t tell someone’s pronouns by looking at them. If in doubt, ask – or use the person’s name. Got it wrong? Correct yourself briefly and carry on – no long apology, or the other person ends up comforting you.
No room for discrimination
Racism, antisemitism, sexism, lesbophobia, queerphobia or transphobia, ableism or any other kind of putting people down: not here, not even as a joke. That goes for guests and the team alike.
Neighbours live outside the door
Please keep it quiet outside, especially after 10 pm. Whether we get to stay here also depends on good neighbourly relations.
If someone forgets a rule, we’ll kindly remind them – if someone breaks it on purpose, they can’t stay.
Awareness
If something happens
We believe you first. We ask what you need instead of deciding for you.
Support from us
- Say “Awareness” at the bar – that’s enough as a whole sentence.
- Tell us what you need: to talk, a glass of water, some quiet, or for the other person to leave. We’ll work out together what’s possible.
- Nothing happens over your head – unless someone is in danger.
You can also write to us later: hallo@4pearls.de, ideally with “Awareness” in the subject line.
Help from outside
Helpline “Violence against Women” (Hilfetelefon)
Free, anonymous, around the clock, in many languages including English, and in sign language.
Telefonseelsorge (crisis line)
Or 0800 111 0 222. Free and anonymous, also around the clock; calls are answered in German.
Complaints about us
If the problem is with us – at the door, behind the bar, in the team – write to hallo@4pearls.de with “Complaint” in the subject line. We’ll reply, even if it gets uncomfortable.
I want to join the awareness team
Great! Tell us through the form what you bring – we’ll be in touch. To the form
“4PEARLS stands for connection, visibility, empowerment and safe spaces for FLINTA*s”